June 30, 2011 | Guatemala

Broken

My heart has been broken into fragments.

Broken for the 32million girls in modern day slavery
            but more specifically
Broken for Mercy*, one of these girls,
            whose spirit is dejected and hopeless
            whose eyes lit for such a brief second
            when she thought she saw her son, who she hasn’t seen for 7 months.
Broken for the abandoned and the orphans
            but more specifically
Broken for Jamie*
            whose smile lights up the room
            but whose basic needs aren’t met
            and who is left, desperate for love.
Broken for the hungry who scavenge
            through rotting piles of trash
            but more specifically
Broken for the 2 little boys
            squatting under a tree, hungry
            unwilling go look at me, or smile.
Through brokenness
            my eyes have been opened
I see the world in a new light
I have been changed, burdened
            and I can never
                        ever
                                    go back.

About a week ago, I asked God again to break my heart for what breaks His and in His faithfulness, He answered that prayer. Throughout this last week I have heard so many stories–stories from prostitutes, from children, from elderly, and many others. The one common thread is that each one is desperate for love and for freedom. Perhaps the one that broke my heart the most was that of Mercy*. Mercy was trafficked from Honduras. She has been here for a mere 7 months. But these 7 months have left her lonely, hopeless and empty. While I sat with her one morning in the bar, listening to her story, she suddenly stopped listening and peered intently out the door, straining to get a better look. After she refocused, I asked her what she saw. With heartbroken eyes, she told me that she saw a child that looked like her son. Her heart longs to see her 3 children that are still in Honduras. Mercy is one of 32 million girls in modern day slavery—a horrific fact that makes me sick to my stomach. But through stories like this, God has broken my heart for what breaks His. And I long to love each individual I come into contact and to spread the message of His love and truth.